How to Keep Your Relationship Healthy

Men and women tend to function from two completely different directions when it comes to how they behave in a relationship. This behavior is most prominent in regard to how they communicate and their levels of understanding.

According to studies written by relationship counselors, communication is responsible for more than half of the failed relationships that have been observed and documented.

This is not news to anyone who has experienced a relationship that has lasted more than 30 days. What may be interesting is the variety of issues that cause relationships to fail.

I’ve been on both sides of a broken relationship over my years of living and working as a counselor. Once as a child of a functioning but broken home and once as the spouse who left the relationship.

What I learned from each perspective I have written into a battery of counseling tips and conversations that serve to support couples. The saying, “Knowledge is power,” rings true when it comes to relationship rescue. If you have 5 minutes to spare to focus on your relationship skills, you can learn to make your relationship lighter. By lighter I mean, the heaviness that many relationships carry is based on baggage being carried by the partners. Most often the partners carry this baggage silently.

The primary issue that impacts the relationship is not the baggage or the presenting issues that cause or contribute to the failure of the relationship. What tends to feed the decline is the silent suffering combined with a subconscious belief that the other partner should be aware of this baggage, even though neither of them has given anything more than a hint of what is being carried.

Making your relationship lighter may be an alien term or merely a distracting thought with a funny name. Take 5 minutes to open your mind to some new possibilities that may be hidden in your relationship.

John Maxwell, author of “Relationships 101,” says, “People don’t care how much you know, until they know how much you care.” When it comes to relationships, most often the male and the female partner fail to communicate this fundamental message.

Looking deeper into ways of strengthening your relationship beyond the physical level of living together, means each partner must be deeply committed to the other partner. This includes taking the risk of assuming the other partner is carrying baggage silently.

This is not a license to pry or aggressively intrude into the other partner’s privacy, because privacy is always vital in a relationship. Communication is not expecting your partner to disclose every details of their day. Communication travels to emotional locations untouched by words alone.

What helps to understand the balance that is needed begins by looking into the mirror and searching for a way of getting a handle on one’s own baggage. It often occurs in the partnering of individuals that while opposites attract, these opposites also share experiences.

It is documented that children who grown up in a home where a spouse has been abused will mostly find themselves in an abusive relationship as adults. Recognizing the reality of the presence of this baggage in one’s self forms the basis of the subconscious desire for the other partner’s understanding in the form of silent knowing.

Additionally, this type of baggage also provides a basis for deeper understanding of the partner’s own behavior as well as any communicational barriers that have been observed to exist.

The healing and preventative process must begin with a message and an understanding that baggage, both known and unknown, exists in the relationship. Both partners must also recognize that communication is a major player in both the success of their relationship, while lack of communication can be the primary reason for any potential for the failure of the relationship.

“Relationships of trust depend on our willingness to look not only to our own interests, but also the interest of others.”

Peter Farquharson

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Senior Online Dating – I Am Too Olds!

Ask a senior if they would like to date and the answer would be yes. Ask them why they are not dating and the answer would be I am too old to date. Seniors want to date but do not date because they feel they are too old. Let us examine, too old. Baby boomers are people born post World War II. After WWII the American economy was booming. The GI bill enabled more of the middle class people to purchase homes. Baby Boomer were the Free Thinking generation. The birth control pill had been invented. Women could control pregnancies and ushered in Women Liberation. Online dating was unheard of computer were used commercially and not domestically. If you were a Boomer you met a mate in high school, college, through a friend or family member, at work, at a party or a night-club. The internet has changed matchmaking 1 out of 5 dates are found online.

In an ideal world a Boomer would meet their soul mate, marry and live together for ever. For most, this may not be the reality. As a senior, you maybe a divorcee, widow, widower and never met the right partner. For whatever reasons today you are a single senior.

What is too old? We are in a youth oriented society. You may have a few wrinkles. Wrinkles are a normal part of ageing. You may have gained a few extra pounds. As a senior, who has not gained weight? If a woman in your twenties you may have been a size six and now you’re a size twelve on a good day. Today’s senior are looking pretty darn good wrinkles and all. Wrinkle and weight are exterior features a soul mate is searching for the values and ideas in a partner.

Seniors are a large demographic in society. Baby Boomers have lived through one of the most innovative and progressive period in history. Seniors are healthier, live longer and are highly intelligent. Between 2006-2007 senior online dating increased 140%. Senior online date ages 55 years old and older. Date search locally, nationally and internationally. Combine your date search and search ethnically, search by religion, executive search, pet lover, green search, military search and etc. If you are considering joining an online dating service you will have to complete an in-depth profile and supply self photos. There are monthly fees for the service but you can cancel at anytime. Date members have access to photo and member profiles. The are private emails, video chats, senior community boards, senior safety tips and professional tips about online dating do’s and don’ts . 21st Century dating where you are in control when choosing a mate.

No illusions Senior Online Dating finding that special someone may take time. Seniors that join dating services reasons differ: Companionship, Casual Dating, and Serious Dating, Looking for a Long Term Relationship, Mutual Values and Ideals, Respect, Expand Social Circles, Love and or Marriage. the Perfect Partner Matchmaking for the 21st Century.Senior this is your time. Being a partner and parenting your time was never your own. You have devoted your life to your ex-partner and children. Now you maybe a divorcee, widow or widower. The children maybe grown with families of their own. You are free and now it is your time. Finding

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Truth Behind Rebound Relationship

A rebound relationship is a relationship that blooms right after a break-up. Sometimes, people get caught in a rebound relationship if his/her relationship with the current partner is getting cold or after a long romantic relationship came to an end.

People usually tend to jump to a new relationship right after the break up for distraction. They wanted to be in another relationship in order for them not to feel the pain of the breakup. They cover the hurting feeling with so much love and affection they have for their partners. A person who just had a failed relationship usually gets involved in another relationship because of the fear to be alone. Most of the time relationship on the rebound is misconceived as a way to move on.

When you find yourself in this situation, avoid expecting your partner to correct the faults your previous partner had made. If you expect your lover to do this, you are not giving any solution to your present problem.

When the recently ended relationship is considered to be a waste of time, people get into a new relationship to somehow make up for lost time. This is something positive since it can help the present relationship to grow. The danger of it however, is it can lead someone to a wrong direction.

Masking the pain is one of the major reasons why people get into a rebound relationship and this also becomes one of the major problems of the said relationship. If you came from a bad relationship and you jumped quickly to your present relationship, you probably are using your partner at the moment and sooner or later you might leave him/her after he/she already served his/her purpose. If you immediately got involved after a bad relationship, be honest and tell your partner about your intentions.

If you are currently in a relationship which you think could be rebound, never allow your partner to take charge of the relationship for you might see yourself caught in a relationship you hardly understand and eventually, you will be left alone to pick up the pieces when your partner decides to move on. As for single people, never allow yourself to be involved in a rebound relationship or if it’s inevitable, at least allow the relationship to develop slowly and take care of yourself emotionally.

Remember that suffering and pain are ways to mold us and turn us to people who are more compassionate and empathetic. Hence, the best way is to face your heartaches and let the wounds heal first before jumping to another relationship and you will be amazed on how you have changed as a person.

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3 Online Dating Tips to Find Your Perfect Woman

Trying to find a woman if you’re a busy guy can be a difficult challenge. If you work long hours and don’t have a chance to get out much, then many of the normal dating avenues are not readily available.

That is why online dating has become an incredible resource for many busy guys.

But the one problem with online dating is there are too many choices. It seems like every day there are a number of new online dating sites. As a result, it’s important to know what you’re doing when using an online dating resource.

Online dating is not a scientific process. Instead of following a specific formula, you have to keep trying different things till you find something that works for you. Once you find a service and type of profile which brings a lot of successful dates, you know your actions are working.

In order to help you get started with online dating, here are three easy steps to follow:

Your first step is to choose the right dating service which will help you find the right kind of woman. No matter what type of woman you’re looking for, you can find her on an online dating service.

The best part of online dating is there are websites which fulfill all sorts of tastes and interests. For instance, there are sites professionals, religion, ethnic dating services, age and sexual preference. By going to a site which caters to your specific interest, you can easily find that special woman.

When you find the right online dating service, it’s important to create an interesting profile. Now when you have an online profile, you should make sure to include a great picture of yourself. Since pictures are the first thing a woman sees, you need to take the time to select one which shows you in the best light. You might want to have a professional picture taken of you.

In addition to having a quality picture, you have to create a profile which is interesting and also demonstrates a humorous nature. You can increase your chance of success by crafting an online dating profile which demonstrates a unique profile.

Your final step is to start making connections with women who find interesting. All you have to do is send them introductory emails and find out if there might be a connection.

My advice is to be yourself and not worry too much about making a good impression. Just remember to be polite but also work at getting to know each woman.

If you follow these three tips, you’ll discover it’s pretty easy to find interesting women from an online dating service.

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Pre-Marriage Counseling

Starting a marriage is a very important step in life but be not naive. It is something that should be taken seriously. Finding a good marriage counselor is not just for bad marriages. Good marriages that want to be great or new relationships starting marriages are great fertile ground for seeing a marriage counselor.

Most churches offer classes now, on pre-marital counseling. Many of the priests or pastors strongly require counseling if not make it mandatory. These classes range from subject to subject and can also go as deep as understanding why we make certain choices we do and how we can refrain from making it an issue.

A certain Christian Marriage Counselor, Chuck Sugar out of Nashville TN has videoed some of his classes and you can check them out here http://www.ChuckSugar.com. His classes are fun and very enjoyable as they are socially structured, have as many as 20 couples and drop any and all defenses when talking about key issues. Different from his one on one sessions these sessions are geared for marriages that want to learn how to make a good marriage better and engaged couples.

Most of these classes are pretty basic but cover the main reasons marriages fail.

First, Financial issues. Second, Religious choices. Third, Disciplining Children

Some of the more in-depth topics will cover:

1. how you were raised determines how you respond to your spouse. 2. how your fears and pains from past relationships affect your marriage. 3. how to take responsibility for your own feelings so that blame does not come into the picture and cause problems.

Couples today are jumping into marriage without much thought to making it work. Marriage should not be considered if the couple has never taken the time to discuss the major issues and reasons why marriages fail. The good news is marriage counseling is available to all and anyone now days and in many different formats. It’s there if you look.

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Bridge the Gap Between Your Relationship by Getting Advice Online

It is a beautiful feeling when two people come together in a relationship. Love is a gesture which can win hearts and which makes you feel special and wanted. In today’s society, people are boldly expressing their feelings and desires of being able to decide about whom they want to be with. A steady relationship seems very appealing to others, but have you thought about what problems arises while driving a relationship? Yes, many people encounter issues in their relationship which somehow increases with the span of time. It should be understood that people who come together need to be matured when they are serious about their togetherness.

Maturity means understanding, respect, space and trust, but unfortunately a time may come when one partner or both take a stand on their ego and choose to drag an issue which later becomes a reason for trouble. As most of the couples are working professionals, most of them don’t have much patience and things start turning sour. All thanks to the advancement in society, there are few professional firms which take an initiative of sorting out the issues which develop among couples. All you have to do is be cognizant about the issue and ready to reconcile with your partner.

As quoted by a famous Mexican writer, Doménico Cieri Estrada, “To know when to go away and when to come closer is the key to any lasting relationship”, the ultimate choice depends on you. Few experienced firms provide counselling online and give away the best relationship advice for couples. According to such firms, every relationship can benefit from an ongoing relationship with an expert couples coach and counsellor. Being in a relationship is an important major step in your life and experts from such firms understand that you want your couple relationship to be the happiest and have the love last a lifetime.

Such experienced counsellors for couples provide assistance in every way possible so that both partners can make their relationship stronger. Few of the services offered by these experts allows couples to discover ways to create an atmosphere of total safety, joy, full disclosure and validation with each other, allows couple to learn safe ways to communicate what is troubling them in a productive and pleasant manner, allows to discover new ways for the partners to give compassionate attention to each other and express their needs without rebuking, belittling or blaming and allows to learn new skills to work through conflicts to find win-win resolution.

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Why Couple Counseling is Necessary Before Marriage

Couple counselling is very important if there is any misunderstand between them. Getting married is the essential decision, love and trust between husband and wife is assumed to be strongest assets to make the relationship good. Hence prior marriage it becomes necessary for both brides and grooms to understand each other.

It is also true that no relationship or marriage is free from problems, trouble and obstacles. The rate of divorce is also higher because of finances, lack of communication, disloyalty or addictions. So it is important to have a premarital couple counselling today. Research has presented that with minimum six sessions of couple counselling before marriage you can raise your success of about 80 percent.

Couple counselling prior marriage is useful in accepting what wedding is actually all about. People planning to get in to the wedlock must get a program which can assist that relationship stay locked for more years to arrive.

Marriage is the intimate link between two persons hence it is good spending few hours of time to insure that link will not be broken due to the reason of lack of communication. The flush of physical and emotional love people have can cause them to overview some behaviors which can create a relationship to fail later on.

Therefore getting that objective couple counselling before the marriage can assist them to get right perspective of the good relationship and know the exact concept of marriage. A wedding puts two individuals together who have created a commitment to live together. Along with the commitments, most of the responsibilities like work responsibilities, children, mortgages and daily chores etc.These can turn as liabilities which results to clashes.

Couple counseling before marriage can assist them to get ready for these struggles and will present them the ways to solve them. Before marriage, they enter in to the relationship without understand anything about them like their character and behavior. There may have been problems that people simply neglect or people did not know them.

In most of the cases personal problems which have not been solved in the past can turn as big strain in to the marriage. So premarital counseling will play an important role in bringing to the surface these issues. Facing the past helps them to check their behavior and how this behavior can affect in the future days. You can see assistance to solve these problems prior they turn as barrier later on.

Most of the couples prevent premarital counseling because they afraid that some problems arise at counseling may hinder the couples from getting married. Do not get fear to face the real fact, it is also good to work with these problems prior the marriages takes place.

Pre martial couple counseling will assist you check the differences that are making issues. Marriages are made in the heaven, so avoiding these issues in the life will make the life easier.Couple counselling before marriage assists you to plan different methods of overcoming and solving the painful circumstances in the future days.

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Relationships Advice For Couples In Love

Relationships advice may possibly affect love relationships which can also be amongst the funniest types of relationships I have ever encountered. So why do I say this? You may ask. Well for starters, they can be quite simple in nature, and yet very complicated at the same time.

Consider an example of a person I found in a nightclub. I was kicking back and listening to good quality jams. Immediately, a man comes and sits together with me and orders just a few cans of beer. I love to consider it as a type of bar, talking about love relationships advice. Anyway, this dude arrives and also sits down next to me and sets out speaking to me about his sweetheart, in other words ex-girlfriend. He told me how he caught her cheating.

So you see, this youthful lady, who he was in fact inside a relationship with, was basically also pals with one of this particular guys male cousins. Let us call this dude James, the woman Joyce and then the male cousin Peter. So Peter was having a relationship with Joyce right behind James back in yet another love relationship.

A funny factor is that James didn’t have an understanding about Peter and his purposes, until finally he learned down the road that he’d told on on him behind James back and released details relating to a particular date during which James had been unfaithful to Joyce. This made James as well as Joyce to put an end to the love affair due to the fact that the relationship just would not work.

I know it actually sounds like something that happens in Mexican romance films, however it transpired. On the other hand, when they broke off the relationship, Joyce begun calling James and informed him that she can’t stop thinking about him, not to mention that she wants James back. James nonetheless does not believe Joyce is trustworthy.

Relationships advice with respect to true love? Judge for yourself.

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Advice on Obtaining a Girlfriend: Sure Ways to Easily Win a Girl’s Heart

These days, you can always refer to the Internet for several tips on getting a girlfriend easily. Looking for this kind of information is not difficult – it’s putting what you’ve learned into action that is the most challenging. Just remember, all these tips will be useless if you yourself are not ready to handle a girlfriend so make sure you are before you go looking for one.

Open Yourself Up

The quickest way for any guy to find a girlfriend is for him to open himself up to all kinds of women and not just those he thinks he will be attracted to. Unless you are among the few who already know exactly the kind of girl that you’re looking for, chances are you are still finding this out for yourself. So go on, try to play the field.

When you choose to play the field, make sure that you make it clear to every girl that you are about to meet. The worst thing you could do is have a girl expect more than you can give. So if you are still on the process of getting to know yourself well, as well as finding the right person that you really want, it is important that you send this message clearly to every girl that you will date, so to avoid having a bad reputation.

Don’t be In a Hurry

It’s unfortunate that there are a lot of guys who cannot wait to have a girlfriend, and will just end up hooking up with someone who can give them time in a day. Remember, girls outnumber boys by a lot so if you can, take your time in choosing. Doing this will not only protect yourself from ending up like a fool, but it also helps in avoiding to hurt a girl unintentionally.

Now, just because you’ve been told to take things slow doesn’t mean you should be playing with the wrong one in the meantime. If you are serious about learning some tips on getting a girlfriend then you need to remember that girls are not meant for playing. This entire article is advising you to take time before making a commitment with someone because girls are not play things and you have no business hurting them just because you’re still searching.

Be real

Being real is the most important advice that you must follow if you want to know how to look for a perfect girl to be your girlfriend. A lot of magazines will give you many ways to impress a girl but what they don’t tell you is that in the end, it always pays to be real about the kind of person you are. This way, you make sure that the girl you end up with is someone who likes you for you and nothing else.

Finding a girlfriend that you can have a meaningful relationship with is not very difficult as long as you keep in mind that girls are not meant to be made fun of nor played with. These tips on getting a girlfriend are here to guide you but ultimately, it will be up to you how you can get to keep one. And as soon as you have found the person that will make you happy and likes you unconditionally, then take good care of her and never let her go, for there are only a few of them there.

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Popular Dating Sites – The way to best online dating?

Popular Dating Sites are now the trend for people who look for real dating experiences. The popular dating scenario experienced a drastic change in last couple of years. From the conventional method of dating it has shifted to internet based popular dating sites where you find a wide array of services and facilities. Even though some are doubted for its reliability, there are a good number of best online dating sites in the domain. People feel a little bewildered while selecting a best online dating site from a plethora of such sites. Dating sites compete each other in giving best services and the searches can be operated by choosing specifications that best suit your interest. Popular dating sites offer searches according to category like region, area of interest and type of relationship sought. While picking a suitable best online dating site, certain factors should be considered, like number of members, features, the special features that make them stand apart from popular dating sites, the target market, and other added features and benefits that can leverage your search and communication.

To build a romantic relationship and to fall in love is the basic impulse of a human being. In the fast phased world there are many obstacles in making a move. Like your office policy that doesn’t allow dating your co-workers, you are an introvert character and have a problem in starting relationship with a stranger, you are averse to the meeting people in a public place, perhaps you are not in a mood to meet people, hate the bar atmosphere, and so many dislikes you may be having. Here there is no need of such inhibitions, you identify likeminded profiles or profiles that match your interest and can go forward. There is no need to jump into a date, you can chat, discuss and share your views taking enough time and finally come to a decision to meet the person on a date.

Starting the process requires you to create a profile in some of the good dating sites. Here you can browse through umpteen profiles and get as much as information. Many of these sites provide facility to stay anonymous and know about people until it is right time to reveal the identity. There are dating sites which you can register absolutely free and search your match. They don’t make you sit hours and answer questions to find a suitable match for you. These sites approach is to make couples spend time to know and understand each other and to find their compatibility. The advantage of free sites is that they have more users and it is easy to find a suitable date there.

Every year thousands of people find their love blooming online. Here you get a unique platform to carry your love forward at your own phase with enough modes of communication and a safe environment.

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